Tuesday, August 15, 2006

butterlies????

who me??? you would think it was ME going to school! I tossed and turned so much last night... saw every hour on the clock... all the kids in bed with me... nobody hogging space.. nobody kicking... except those darn butterflies in ME!
Well, I finally drifted off and then BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ I set the alarm and not music... won't make that mistake again! lol! It was so loud! The kids didn't even move! I got dressed and then started waking the girls... Queen V got up first- she had to go color her daddy's face in.. I made her stop last night and go to bed.... then woke Lady G. We got her dressed from head to toe, hair brushed silky smooth... and then the baby wakes... great! all 3 kids up and time for breakfast!

We have a great breakfast of "loopty loops" (that would be Fruit Loops for the rest of the world) and OJ dd made yesterday. I took pics (will have to post tomorrow) while she ate and discussed what she thought first grade would bring. She had no idea.. I did... BUTTERFLIES kicking into high gear... so many unknowns... well, we took pics by the front door and had time to swing on the swings! yipeee!

We grab the gear and out the door we go! My car's transmission is going out- go figure- so I have to stop 3 different times to turn the thing off and back on... hoping it will finally shift gears.. it finally does.. whew!

We get to school - say a Hail Mary and Our Father in the car before we step out.. who says there's no prayer in school... LOL! We go to the first grade hall and there's not one person there... so we go to the cafeteria to wait.... good- a few friends there... MY butterflies are disappearing.. I take a few pics of her with her buddy Clint :)

The bell goes off... Queen V grabs her sister and says, "don't go! I'll miss you so!" gulp!
I have to look away.... MY butterflies return.. only in MY eyes!!! oh, why does this have to be so hard?? I gulp and they subside... whew! I tell her to come on... babe in sling, Queen V grabs my hand... but not the school girl- nope, she is leading the way!!!!

We go to her classroom and kids are at their desks, working, it's quiet.. a few mommies there with cameras- not too many and I am surprised.. where are they??? I wanted one more day and I will take all the moments I can suck up!!! lol! I tell her to look in her backpack and take out what the other kids have on their desk and get to it... There is a daddy in between us... I can't get to her... oh... why don't you move to your child... I can't hug mine goodbye....
I finally ask him to excuse me.... he moves and I give my girl a quick hug and kiss. She tells me goodbye. I go into the hallway.. I look over my shoulder.. she is looking at me... not happy, not sad... a scared look on her face.... I can't go back in. She's not crying and the teacher was looking at us to go... it's time....
I do our secret hand gesture telling her I love her... she sees me... does it back..... I walk away...
love you baby girl.....
play nice with the other kids..... even if they don't play nice with you.....

MY butterflies fly away by the end of the day... yep, and I watched the clock to see every hour pass... I knew it would only bring her one more hour closer to home..... closer to ME !

2 comments:

Alli said...

Oh AM! I know where you are.....there was no looking back this year as Alex started 2nd grade! Not even a glance....they grow so fast!

JB said...

so touching! I hope she had a great day and came back with lots of exciting stories of people she met and new things she learned! And I hope your butterflies and happily gone! What did dh say when he came home?